Fatty Dumpling

A piece of cake does not exist until someone eats it.

Category: Snacks

Kracie’s Happy Kitchen Sushi

1 Kracie Sushi

This food is so suspicious. But also so much fun to make.

2 Kracie Sushi

3 Kracie Sushi

All the instructions were in Japanese. However, a quick internet search revealed many Youtubers sharing wisdom on what to do Kracie’s Happy Kitchen Sushi.

The main idea is to mix multiple packets of powder with water in order to produce everything you need from sushi ‘rice’ to ‘soy sauce’. Some of candies smelled pleasantly of fruits while others smelled disgustingly of bubble gum.

There’s a little spoon to mix, a dropper to add water—and you use your fingers to shape the candies.

Me brotha, seesta, and I settled down for some sibling bonding time.

4 Kracie Sushi

5 Kracie Sushi

Do you see the above picture? I’m making roe by dropping the orange liquid into the clear one. Insane!

6 Kracie Sushi

I know, I’m fascinated by this largely because it’s from another culture. Can you imagine how kids from Japan would smirk at my amusement of things they see every day?

7 Kracie Sushi

8 Kracie Sushi

This is all edible, folks. And I’m sure it’s safe.  Tastes awful though, with a terrible texture.

9 Kracie Sushi

Kracie’s Happy Kitchen Sushi

  1. Cut open the inner plastic package along the dotted lines. This is your sushi workstation.
  2. With the dropper, add water to the large oval dish until it reaches the lined edge of the oval. Add the large blue packet of powder to this dish and mix well with the blue spoon. This is your ‘rice’.
  3. Shape your rice into 7  rectangular prisms.
  4. With the dropper, add water in the long rectangular dish closest to the A and B dish until it reaches the lined edge of the rectangle. Add the yellow packet of powder to this dish and mix well. This is your ‘egg’. When it has solidified, use your spoon to cut it in half.
  5. With the dropper, add water in the long rectangular dish closest to the oval dish until it reaches the lined edge of the rectangle. Add the pink packet of powder to this dish and mix well. This is your ‘salmon’. When it has solified, use your spoon to cut it in half.
  6. Add water to the A dish until it reaches the lined edge of the A dish. Add the green packet of powder to this dish and mix well.
  7. Add water to the B dish until it reaches the lined edge of the B dish. Add the orange packet of powder to this dish and mix well.
  8. With the dropper, suck up the liquid from the B dish and drip this mixture into the A dish slowly, one drop at a time. This is your ‘fish roe’.
  9. The black gummy is your ‘seaweed’. Cut this in half and shape the seaweed using the guide on your mat.
  10. Wrap the seaweed around your rice.
  11. Add water to the dish until it reaches the lined edge. Add the brown packet of powder to this dish and mix well. This is your ‘soy sauce’. Use the dropper to squeeze the soy sauce onto your finished sushi.
  12. Put sprinkles from the packet on top of the rice. You can put a piece of egg on your rice. You can put some salmon on top of your rice. You can also put some fish roe on top of your rice. Be creative!
Advertisements

Olive Oil Granola Bars

Fatty Dumpling wakes up. It is 7am. She looks at the ceiling. She squints at the window. Fart.

Glasses pop onto her face. She waddles to the bathroom. Does her bathroom business. Fatty bares her teeth at the mirror.

She waddles back to her bedroom. Turns on her laptop and tip toes to the kitchen. Shhhhhh…roommate still asleep. Must be quiet. What is there to eat? Too many options. Eggs. Bread. Bananas. Apples. Yogurt. Tuna fish. Peanut butter. Tuna fish and peanut butter. Ewwgrossyuckittyyuckyuck. Well, maybe.

She munches and chews and chews while watching quality tv on her laptop. HARHARHAR, people are so clever nowadays. HARHARHAR.

Fatty slips on outside clothes and catches her bus for school. With a lasso, man. (HARHARHAR—Fatty is clever too).

She sits in class and glares at her prof. If she doesn’t focus and glare, she runs the risk of accidentally falling asleep. That wouldn’t be a nice thing to do, especially since she respects her profs. Her profs are seriously smart people and says a multitude of intelligent things. Just yesterday, Fatty learned about the philosopher Hilary Putnam. Sadly, the only thing Fatty remembers learning is that Hilary Putnam is a happy guy who always looks happy in his pictures. (It’s actually important; other philosophers look really surly in comparison).

She goes home after school. She’s pooped so falls haphazardly onto the couch in a heap. Butt sticking up.

Fatty had shared a bus with a bunch of incredibly beautiful people. And she fell in love with all of them. It takes up a lot of energy, falling in love. A whole pile of people are now wandering through Guelph with bits of Fatty’s heart.

Goodness gracious. The girl hasn’t spoken a word to a soul all day. Unless you count her whistling to the bus stop and arguments with herself in her head (you mustn’t stare at the purple hair or drool over that girl’s tantalizing-smelling french fries). Fatty, you should speak more often. Make some friends. Converse about politics and what is supposedly wrong with the world. Yes, dear.

Suh, I made some granola bars with olive oil. Usually, I’d use margarine as the fat composition but thought to experiment one day to see how olive oil would affect the bars. Surprisingly, I could not taste the olive oil (only chocolate and oaty goodness) and the bars came out chewy and delicious. True greatness.

Olive Oil Granola Bars
Original recipe by Smitten Kitchen, this copy just adds olive oil to it :]

1 2/3 cups oats
1/2  cup sugar
1/3 cup oat flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
2 to 3 cups dried fruits and nuts (I used a combo of walnuts, sesame seeds, poppy seeds, hemp hearts, and chocolate chips)
1/3 cup peanut butter or another nut butter (I used peanut butter)
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
6 tablespoons olive oil
1/4 cup + 2 tbsp honey, maple syrup or corn syrup (I used honey)
1 tablespoon water

Preheat the oven to 350°F. Grease an 8″ x 8″ x 2″ pan or line with parchment paper.

Stir together all the dry ingredients. In a separate bowl, whisk together the vanilla, olive oil, liquid sweeteners and water. Toss the wet ingredients with the dry and the nut butter until the mixture is evenly crumbly. Spread in the prepared pan, pressing them in firmly.

Bake the bars for 30 to 40 minutes, until they’re brown around the edges.

Cool the bars in their pan.

Once cool, cut the bars into squares and eat!

Homemade Nutella

Happy Christmas, dears. Do you celebrate? Even if you don’t, and particularly if you live in an area with a high population—there’s a highly contageous festive mood in the air. Lights! Shiny baubles! Fat men in red suits! Jolly, jolly, jolly!

Now, people in my neck of the woods usually expect presents at this time of year. This year, I made some Nutella (a chocolate and hazelnut spread) to wrap up for peeps. It tasted divine. But goodness, that was a whole lot of chocolate that I had to melt down.

Homemade Nutella
I used the recipe by David Lebovitz. The only thing I changed was using completely hazelnuts.

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Granola Bars

I’ve never walked around alone in the dark as I have in these past 4 months.

I don’t drive, and buses sometimes don’t run early enough for me to get to work sometimes, so I walk the hour to work. On other times, my work runs late and I miss the last bus, so I walk the hour home. True, I can take the cab, but I am an awful cheapskate. Rather use that money for groceries. Or books. You should see my pantry and bookshelf. I’ll never be hungry for food or stories! BWAH!

Did you know…that skunks exist in the world? Personally, I’ve only seen them on tv. I did not realize that until I saw many in real life. Goodness gracious, it is terrifying to see one run directly towards you. They are terrifying runners! Their bodies roll and tumble like sacks of potatoes falling down a hill. I’d guffaw outloud if I wasn’t running away to keep my skin human-smelling.

To make up for all the skunk existence that pops into being at night, people seem to disappear. It’s rare for me to bump into a human soul in the night time. It’s just me and the world at night. And the stars! They exist and they twinkle!  So, it’s me, the world, the stars, and the skunks.

My story about skunks and the night has nothing to do with the food I made: Pumpkin Chocolate Chip granola bars. I just really wanted to share my amazement with you. To re-cap: 1. Skunks are fur-reaky when they run. 2. Stars exist. 3. It’s not that scary to walk alone in the middle of the night. Just don’t think too hard about the things that go bump in the night.

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Granola Bars
I used the recipe by Two Peas & Their Pod.

Kracie’s Happy Kitchen Donuts

What kinds of toys did you play with as a kid?

In my childhood, the dollar store was the holy grail of opportunity for my siblings and I. Stickers, little plastic toys, balls, paints and markers that dried up within a week…We were the kiddos of the first Playstation and the third Nintendo console (Nintendo 64). Street Fighter used to scare me poopless. Now, I admire the little dudes’ and dudettes’ abundant muscles.

We grew up with computers and thought that they had always existed. Now, I don’t think kids even know what a VCR is.

Kids grow up fast and toys have to keep up with their constant need for entertainment.

What the heck were Japanese kids playing with when I was a kid?

In an Asian snack shop, I found this edible toy made by the Kracie company. It’s called Happy Kitchen and kids mix up powders with water to make…mini donuts! What?! Cool! We can eat it?!

My brother said that in contrast to the $5 I paid for this box, Japanese kids find this in their equivalent of my dollar store (…the 100 yen store?). Fabulous! If I was a drooling babe in Japan, maybe my fascination with dollar store toys would have translated to this boxed mix.

So, my brother, sister, and I sat around this tiny kit to make tiny donuts together. We cut, poured, mixed, squeezed…It was hilarious seeing my brother’s huge hand sprinkle tiny sprinkles onto a tiny donut.

It was fun! A whole lot of work to come up with 8 donuts—it’s a toy that will definitely take up time. And a person can come up with some pretty cute little donuts, eh?

Taste-wise, though…it was…revolting. Well, it was palatable. I actually liked the taste of the strawberry frosting. That frosting tasted like yummy artificial strawberries. The sprinkles were sweet and crunchy and the other frosting tasted reminiscently of what they were supposed to taste like. The thing that was off-putting was the texture and taste of the donuts themselves. They were squishy and tasted like soggy bread.

So, it was a good purchase for the fun-value, but never buy again for food. And don’t even think about what might be in those powders…

Kracie’s Happy Kitchen Donuts
these instructions summarizes those found on the toy box and from the videos by RRcherrypie and emmymadeinjapan; and of course, my own experiences

In your box kit, you should find:

1 plastic tray
1 blue plastic spoon
2 large packages of powder for the donuts
3 small packages of powder for the icing
1 icing bag
1 bag of sprinkles
1 bag of cookie crumbs

  1. The plastic wrapping was made to be used as a place mat. Cut it up on the dotted lines or rip it open.
  2. Cut up your plastic tray into three different parts for easy donut creation. The donut moulds should be cut off of the 3 tray section for mixing powders. In one corner, there is a little tray that should be cut off—this is what you use to measure water for mixing.
  3. In the largest tray, pour in the large orange package of powder. This is the vanilla donut powder. Using the small water tray, pour in water, one at a time until a pliable dough is formed, using the blue spoon to mix . (It took me 8 trays of water). Separate the dough into 4 equal pieces. Take the dough out of the tray.
  4. Complete step 5 with the large brown package of powder—this is the chocolate donut powder.
  5. With each piece of dough, press them into the donut moulds. Tap the bottom gently to remove the donuts from the donut moulds. (If you push the bottom of the moulds with your fingers, you’ll risk ruining the moulds for future donuts).
  6. In the small slanted tray, pour in the powder from the small blue package and mix in one small water tray. This is the vanilla icing.
  7. In the small rectangular tray, pour in the powder from the small red package and mix in one small water tray. This is the vanilla icing.
  8. In the large tray, pour in the powder from the small brown package and mix in one small water tray. This is the chocolate icing. Spoon all of the chocolate icing into the small icing bag and snip off a corner so you can ice your donuts with it.
  9. With your spoon, ice your donuts with your icing. Ice with the icing in the icing bag. And sprinkle on the sprinkles and cookie crumbs.
  10. Eat and enjoy!